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Short Story: Principal No-Nonsense Gagol | By: Morenikeji Olatunji

‘NOW, this is all i want, Facts. Teach these boys and girls nothing but Facts. Facts alone are wanted in life. Plant nothing else, and root out everything else. You can only form the minds of reasoning animals upon Facts: nothing else will ever be of any service to them. This is the principle on which I bring up my own children, and this is the principle on which I bring up these children. Stick to Facts’
These were the words of Mr Tochukwu Afukwere, Principal of the great Solid Foundation College as he addressed his teachers in front of his student on the assembly ground.
Mr Tochukwu Afukwere a man of realities. A man of facts and calculations. A man who proceeds upon the principle that two and two are four, and nothing over, and who is not to be talked into allowing anything else and this was why he was nicknamed NO-NONSENSE GAGOL by teachers and students.
Despite his thin mouth and wide range of teeth, tiny legs filled with hairs, pot bellied stomach and bald head Mr No-Nonsense Gagol was always ready to pick on someone, anytime, anywhere, anyhow and for any reason. As he walked past the students, he noticed a girl in the Jss 2 row.
‘The tall fair girl on row Jss 2’. He pointed with his square finger. ‘I don’t know that girl, who is she?’
‘Lizzy Bodunrin, sir’ The young girl said blushing and stepping out of line ‘ I just got a transfer to this school, sir’
‘Lizzy is not a name’. He barked. ‘Don’t call yourself Lizzy, call yourself Elizabeth’
‘That’s what my father calls me, sir’ retorted the young girl in a trembling voice, the other students burst into roaring laughter.
‘Your father shouldn’t call you that’. His voice was louder. ‘Tell him he mustn’t. Am i clear Miss Elizabeth Bodunrin and please I would like to know, what does he do for a living?’
‘He works at the zoo, sir.‘ The young girl said with pride. A smile lit on her face. The other students burst into another session of laughter
Mr. Afukwere frowned, and flagged his hand down.
‘We don’t want to know anything about that, here. You mustn’t tell us that. Your father is a zoo keeper, a zoo keeper and nothing but a zoo keeper.’
‘For how long will he be keeping the zoo? He asked
Lizzy apparently embarrassed by the question still managed a weak smile, “Till he gets a better job sir. Sir, I also want to say anytime your pupils want to go on excursion, my father will treat them well and ensure they have a worthwhile experience.’ The students murmur among themselves
‘Stories! That’s what you are telling me. Back to my point. You mustn’t tell us about the zoo. Your father is a zoo keeper but that doesn’t give him the right to call you Lizzy, you must agree with me?’
‘True sir’
‘ And when I discover he still calls you by that name. There will be war between me and him. He doesn’t have the right to spoil a beautiful name like that. Very well then, i hereby dismiss you all. Back to your classes and don’t forget to keep hold of the facts firmly. He walked into his office with hands at his back.
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Olatunji Morenikeji is studying Marketing at Lagos State Polytechnic. She works as a freelance production manager, loves writing, singing, reading and cooking
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Email: ololade.olatunji@yahoo/gmail.com
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2 Comments

  1. Funny story, sounds like my principal way back at college and i hope we get to see more of Principal Gagol story. :d

  2. Lol… wetin concern the man with the geh naa'this kain principal na die… Confirm and funny fiction lolade, me likey.

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