For the past few weeks, there have been reports about Madrid President, Florentino Perez expressing his anger at the fitness of ex Tottenham star, Gareth Bale. This 'official' letter however captures the mood at Bernabeu. I find this really hilarious- from beginning to the end. The person who penned it has gone nuts

Excerpts:

"I am writing to you regarding some faulty goods I recently purchased that I believe are not of satisfactory quality.. however due to the complex nature of the transaction, a model is not possible at this time and seller is unwilling to offer a refund.

I purchased the Gareth Bale at the beginning of September for €85m but unfortunately the product has some faults.

*Broken in several places specifically the left thigh.

* Does not match the product description in the brochure

*Is not compatible with the CR7

As I'm sure you can appreciate the broken Gareth Bale has caused a large amount of distress to myself and other users of this product. Inorder to fund the purchase of the Bale, I sold a reliable and technically impressive German device, so I was hoping for a product with better style, quality and reliability.

Please could you advise the best course of action and whether I have a case for a full refund in this instance considering the unsatisfactory quality of the product.

LoL.

Gareth Bale will perform, it's just a matter of time, I personally believe people are expecting too much from him too soon.