8 different types of Nigerian mothers.

Here are the different types of Nigerian Mothers, and trust me, your mother will definitely fit in one or two.

(1) Mummy SWEET & SOUR

This Mother is the one who can spend the whole day chatting with you, she’s very free and always willing to accommodate your friends…she can be so sweet that you call her your “world” but not until you stay out late or ruin any of her treasured belongings, DRAMA O’ CLOCK. This mom would nag you to hell and raise two mountains out of a mole. She also can jump into conclusions quickly as her patience isn’t lengthy.

(2) BITTER LEMON MAMA
Just like the taste of Bitter-Lemon, she is bitter-sweet in every realm of affairs, she can spring up an argument in the middle of a very fun conversation, she’s quick to apologize (most times in a sarcastic way) and can easily forget what the problem was, she leaves you with anger whenever she’s at her game.

This mother rarely has the time to spend and always wants things done at her pace, she could call you home just because she’s bored and could leave you half way just because she’s bored still. This mom is difficult to understand except for her husband and grown kids.

(3) The Christian Mother
This mother comes with more than ten commandments and more rules and regulations than the Nigerian Constitution. She is a disciplinarian to the core and would stop at nothing towards moulding her kids to her religious standards. Moms like these are easily influenced by what “pastor’s wife” says and would always heed to people’s opinions first before her kids’. She rarely has time to teach but would rather instruct. She can be very temperamental but she sure cries a lot.

(4) The IYA OGE
This mother is one very hilarious persona, she’s all about her looks, her attires to “aunty bisi’s child dedication” or her shoe and bag to “August meeting”. She is the most easy to flow with because of her easy going nature. She’s calm and just about anything goes for her. She loves life to the fullest and is a very industrious woman, but mothers like these hardly spend alone-time with their kids, they only send them on errands to aunty kate’s house just to ask what color of gele is to be worn at aunty pat’s mother’s burial.

(5) The Questionnaire MOM.
This mother asks just about any question, from “who bought that shirt for you” to “why are your hands looking this way”. She rarely has the time to find out things, she would just ask you. And this mom sure would embarrass your friends with questions because she’s insensitive to the other person’s feelings. She cuts across as the “caring” mom but it just could get too much.

(6) The “I no go school” MOM.
This mother is one who feels like a bald-headed step child and would stop at nothing just to be heard and seen, and in doing so; she often embarrasses her kids with either wrong sentences or bad composure, she is always the first to be at every P.T.A meeting, making her kids go into hiding because of the fear of the unknown, she sure is very motherly but when she drops statements like “ahhh I know chioma from small na, dem born am on my behalf” you should allow her, she and her caring nature stay home.

(7) The Over-Educated MOM.
This mom would stop at letting you know she’s “been there, done that” she struggles to remain up to date and in doing so; acts a bit childish or “old mama youngie”. She loves to open the bible verse first and likes to read out every word in a newspaper. She’s adored by her mates because of her being schooled. She’s likely to be a teacher or lecturer and has high educational standards for her kids.

(8) The Nollywood MOM.
This Mom is drama unlimited!. She can cry over broken plates and shout over changing TV channels. She can be heard from miles away and if you do not know her? You could refer to her as insane. This mom has the most kids of all moms and can Pray you out of sleep! Hehehe she’s all the moms in one! But one very unique thing about her is her natural flare for her family’s well being.
These are the types of Nigerian Mothers we have, however; your MOM can possess more than one of all these categories. Well…..thank God for dynamism.

Written by:
Daniel Boyle

Movie Review: Omoni Oboli's Being Mrs Elliot | By: Joy Isi Bewaji

I was laughing, sighing, wiping tears, oohing-and-aahing. Omoni has outdone herself! Witty conversations, thigh-clapping hilarity, superb cinematography, dazzling performances, crisp and animated. Long before phony friends and Louboutins, pricey rocks and chic makeup… there was love- in all its saccharine delight.
Omoni Oboli’s “Being Mrs. Elliot” parades a cast and a story filled with warmth that leaves the required sweetened after-taste of comedy mixed with romance and a bit of leisurely suspense. The movie borrows our dissatisfaction, curiosities, hopes and hopelessness, and weaves into it the conviction that is true love.

If it ever exists, it was made known in crisp picture when a village traditional doctor (AY Makun) found Mrs. Lara Elliot (Omoni Oboli)-  an accident victim, discovered in the thick of nowhere, away from her life of luxury in the metropolis, and brought into the shed that was to become her new home.

Lara suffers amnesia, but even that could not conceal the discomfort of this lowly living; a prick of sub-consciousness tries to bring back a past that she must reclaim; yet not forthcoming with memory, she decides to relax in the arms of love- spread wide open by AY.

And between bush paths, a rib-tickling love rival in the form of Bimpe (Lepacious Bose), a rotund piece of theatrical belligerence who constantly makes life nightmarish for Lara; but back-slapping humorous for us- the popcorn viewers.

Early on, there were chirpy faux friends and an oh-so handsome husband, Bill Elliot (Majid), with whom marriage had become a tactless chore. Lara Elliot had made the trip to kill the nagging suspicion of a cheating husband- and alas, call it naiveté or stupidity on the part of Bill, his wife catches him beneath Nonye, his Personal Assistant.
No not sex, just a massage- shoulder massage, with oils and sprawling nakedness and sexy lingerie. Lara is still and angry, but finally finds her answers- this marriage is a trifling joke!

(Bill is really just a clueless hot dude, probably the last one on the planet. But looking so good and so sexy in all his cluelessness, you’d be quick to forgive him, staring at those ripped arms… bless!)

But I deviate…so yes…where was I?

Aha! So this leads to a chance encounter with a woman, Fisayo (Uru Eke), who is running away from her present- she just witnessed the death of her fiancé in the hands of political thugs. Hot on her  trail and because fright has its own unique smell, the thugs are sure to find her in the small city, so she makes a run for it and tries to leave town…

Lara Elliot is leaving town too, back to base, after finding her man and his PA on lust conduit.

The two women meet- Lara and Fisayo. Conversation ensues… admiration of the big wedding rock on one’s finger… an exchange… an accident… and their lives create a twist that births mayhem.

“Being Mrs Elliot” is consumed as ardently as chirpy gossip over drinks and friendship, each lending its own colour and mischief. A sweet love story; genuine with a lot of faith.

I was laughing, sighing, wiping tears, oohing-and-aahing. Omoni has outdone herself! Witty conversations, thigh-clapping hilarity, superb cinematography, dazzling performances, crisp and animated.

AY Makun puts up a heart-warming performance, Uru Eke does excellent work with her bit, Lepacious Bose- bless her; she sparkles, hops and glows in her buxom genius!

And there was Imeh Umoh, by far the funniest man in Nollywood! All he need do is bat his eyelid and you’ll be rolling on the floor. A hiccup, a mispronounced word, a passé act, quirky expressions, that shrink-of-a-voice… Umoh who played the cab driver was resplendent; it broke my heart into tiny happy pieces.

Omoni has proven to be a woman of many parts- a great actor and a good director. You will not miss the professional details lurking in the movie- in between phone calls and the expected filtered sounds, for one.

Nollywood is not running out of breath anytime soon; it is not slowing down. Movies like “Being Mrs. Elliot” show us that the race tracks are just being lined- for a marathon.

2015 Elections: Desmond Elliot, Funke Adesiyan to contest for Lagos, Oyo House of Assemblies (Photos)

These entertainers aren’t joking at all. Desmond Elliot and Funke Adesiyan are some of the celebrities who have also been bitten by the politics bug. They have indicated interest in elective posts at Lagos and Oyo House of Assemblies. Here are their campaign posters. Other celebrities who are running for the same post are singer Abolore “9ice” Akande, actor Bob Manuel Udokwu, singer Kenny Saint Best.

Serious Matter! Residents banned from naming their kids Messi in Lionel Messi's hometown.

This reads as a joke, but unfortunately it isn’t. Just as surprised as you are. Like seriously, thought Messi is a name, yes a name that anybody can bear, the question is didn’t people bear that name long before Lionel Messi was born? Serious matter!

According to Bleacher Report, local officials in Argentine forward, Lionel Messi’s hometown, Rosario have passed a law barring residents from naming their kids Messi, either as the first name of their sons or daughters.

BR learnt that residents are still permitted to name their children Maradona, Ronaldo etc but the surname of their hero is no longer available.

*sigh*

Murder Trial: Oscar Pistorius NOT found guilty

After months of hearings, Thokozile Matilda Masipa, the judge in the murder trial of paralympian, Oscar Pistorius has said that there were not enough facts for him to be found guilty of premeditated murder in the killing of his 29 year-old girlfriend.

Reeva Steenkamp, was shot and killed by the Paralymian in the early hours of Feb. 14, 2013 at his villa in a gated complex in Pretoria, the South African capital.

The Judge said Mr. Pistorius had acted “unlawfully,” and Ms. Steenkamp “was killed under very peculiar circumstances.” She also “The state clearly has not proved beyond reasonable doubt that the accused is guilty of premeditated murder. There are not enough facts. There is no doubt that when the accused fired shots through the toilet door he acted unlawfully.”

Rivalry with Wizkid |HKN Gang| Family | Ladies&many more. Davido speaks The Truth with Olisa Adibua

Episode 3: “The Truth” with Olisa Adibua as he keeps it 100% with arguably one of Africa’s most successful musical talent in 2014, Davido aka O.B.O. In this laid-back interview, the Nigerian phenom opens up on his life and early beginnings in music, family, ladies, his record label – HKN Gang and his rivalry with Wizkid.

Until next Thursday to bring to you another episode of The Truth, subscribe

now on YouTube and be the first to know THE TRUTH!

VIDEO LINK: http://youtu.be/EsIm-5gD394

GEJ orders that #BringBackGoodluck2015 banners be taken down

There’s something I really don’t get here. The President never knew about the banners? Interesting!!! According to reports, President Goodluck Jonathan has ordered that the #BringBackGoodluck2015 banners hung at different locations in Abuja be taken down.

Needless to say the #BringBackGoodluck2015 hashtag has not only be found offensive by Nigerians but members of the international community have also expressed their disgust. He released a statement via his aide, Dr Reuben Abati.

“President Jonathan wholly shares the widely expressed view that the signs which were put up without his knowledge or approval are a highly insensitive parody of the #BringBackOurGirls hash tag.

While President Jonathan appreciates the enthusiastic show of support for his administration by a broad range of stakeholders, he condemns the #BringBackJonathan2015 signs which appear to make light of the very serious national and global concern for the abducted Chibok girls.

The President assures all Nigerians and the international community that his administration remains fully engaged with efforts to rescue the abducted girls and that he will not knowingly promote any actions that will fly in the face of the seriousness of their plight and the anguish of their families.”

7 year-old Ozzybosco makes gospel music debut.

Relentless wonderkid, Ozzybosco is back again. The Superstar and Tinini crooner “OzzyB” who has been busy working on his Lagos State Waste Management Authority (LAWMA) endorsement pet project tagged “KEEP LAGOS CLEAN” Cleanliness Revolution Campaign …children lead whilst adults follow!!! has released a brand new single titled “U REIGN”.

 

OzzyBosco teamed with the IGWE crooners, Midnight Crew and veteran flute master, Dr Tee Mac (MFR) to churn out a dancable praise song “U Reign” for the delight of gospel music lovers worldwide. The song is soul lifting and indeed full of praises to God for blessing him abundantly.

 

The video was directed by ace video director Akin Alabi and it will hit your TV screen soon. Watch out!!!

HULKSHARE LINK:  http://www.hulkshare.com/63wz27kbjuyo

Opinion: #ChibokGirls- Nigerian women should be ashamed of themselves | By: Bayo Oluwasanmi

Political participation is a Human Right. One of the crippling problems facing Nigerian democracy is the elitist nature of its citizen participation.

Our democracy is not an all-inclusive project of a nation state. Majority of our mothers are illiterates and they reside in the rural areas and are excluded from being active players in “government of the people by the people for the people.”

Our democracy has failed to ensure the reliable use of civil and political rights guaranteed by the constitution. It has failed to address economic disparity and social injustice. Though these problems affect every Nigerian, the persistent marginalization of our women in politics and especially in Human Rights left our women swimming naked.

There can be no democracy without women’s equal right to protection against their specific gender vulnerabilities: rape, sexual abuse, domestic violence, abduction, and other barbaric acts targeted against women.
With the abduction of 300 school girls, the stakes couldn’t be higher for Nigerian women to forge a national women’s movement that will include ALL women to fight in their behalf.
Advanced democracies have rich tradition of Feminist Movements with enduring achievements. Nigeria’s tethering and dithering democracy cannot boast of such movements.
Though in the 40s there were sporadic women resistance dictated by occasional grievances. Such rebellion recedes as soon as the women’s demands were met.
What we have today in Nigeria in form of women’s movements are loose associations and non-governmental organizations (NGOs). Even then, most of the women’s NGOs have been infiltrated and infected by the same native tyrants it seek to fight.
Extreme poverty, lack of interest in fighting for gender equality, and bureaucratic hurdles mitigate against women from participating actively and fully in the political process. Some of the hurdles preventing a strong and effective women’s movement in Nigeria include class, ethnicity, religion, culture, education, political beliefs and ideological differences.

When ordinary people joined together they can go far and great change is possible. The whole purpose of human rights is to right wrong. Funmilayo Ransome Kuti crusader and challenger of despotic leaders led Egba women on a protest against taxation.
Margaret Ekpo, a prominent civil rights activist fought for the economic and political rights of women. Gambo Sawaba championed the cause of the oppressed in northern Nigeria. Iyalode Tinubu of Lagos exemplifies the rich participation of women on the economic scene. Moremi offered herself as a woman who saved her people of Ile-Ife.
Nigerian women, where is your faith?
How painful is the unknown pain that your daughters are going through in the hands of the savages that abducted them over 146 days ago? Where do you stand in your social responsibility? You should be ashamed of yourselves. Instead of being repulsed you have closed your eyes and ears as if you’re immune to gender-based crimes. You’re empty, faithless, loveless, and with no zeal!
Today, Nigerian women are missing in action. Where are the Kutis, Ekpos, Sawabas, Tinubus, and the Moremis? Nigerian women have abandoned the Chibok Girls. They have walked away from their motherly duty. They cannot leave the burden and the fight to bring their daughters back to Oby Ezekwesili and few dedicated compatriots.

Nigerian women have failed to unite and present a joint front in fighting the indulgence of wrong desires and gratification of the animal passions of the deranged Boko Haramists. Where are the college and university women graduates? The Chibok tragedy calls for the activation of their feminist raw rage against women oppression and degradation.

Their deafening silence shows they are much more concerned as to the dress and adornment of their bodies. They prefer to spend precious time in ruffling and trimming their garments for the next “owa nbe” all night party than to pitch their tent with the sit-out #BringBackOurGirls group in Abuja.

Our educated women are supposed to be the vanguard leading the intellectual and political movement against all the evils visited upon the Chibok Girls by Boko Haramists. The women have violated every moral obligation towards fighting for the rescue of the girls – they have gone AWOL.

Where is their commitment to a cause? Where is their faith? Where is their rage?  Talking about crises of faith, Mother Teresa once queried: “Where is my faith? Even deep down … there is nothing but emptiness and darkness … How painful is the unknown pain?”
Nigerian women, where is your faith?
How painful is the unknown pain that your daughters are going through in the hands of the savages that abducted them over 146 days ago? Where do you stand in your social responsibility? You should be ashamed of yourselves. Instead of being repulsed you have closed your eyes and ears as if you’re immune to gender-based crimes. You’re empty, faithless, loveless, and with no zeal!

The United Nations now recognize violence against women as a basic human rights abuse. Atrocities such as rape committed against women during armed conflict are acknowledged as a “weapon of war” and a gender-based crime. I believe the abduction of the Chibok Girls falls into this category.

The abduction of Chibok Girls is a violence against women with serious health and development impacts and a gross violation of women’s rights. Violence unleashed on the girls by Boko Haramists means: health consequences, incapacity in reproductive age, physical and sexual abuse lie behind unwanted pregnancies, sexually transmitted infections, including HIV/AIDS, and complications of pregnancy.

The participation of our women in women’s human rights movement must acquire a new weight, a new vision, and a new visibility. Now is the time for Nigerian women to redeem their usually aloof and impersonal image on political and social responsibilities and use Chibok as their passport to dignity by the doing the following:

*Form an all-inclusive women’s movement that will organize women and advocate women’s rights.
*Educate and enlighten women about their rights and how to fight for them.
*Strengthen the capacity of women at all levels.
*Initiate advocacy campaign for policy reforms against gender-based oppression.
*Initiate and monitor program development and analytical frame work geared towards women’s rights.
*Facilitate strategic thinking among women.
*Demand for change from government and other institutions.
*Hold government and institutions accountable for women’s human rights.

It has been over 146 days since the girls were cart off like cows without shepherds. The girls are paying too much price for their prolonged captivity. Their captivity is a deadly dagger aimed at the very heart of womanhood. It was the most devastating assault on a group of innocent young schools girls the world has ever witnessed. It is a case of immense tragedy and trauma.

All pleas to the Jonathan administration to act decisively, desperately, and swiftly to bring our girls home have fallen on deaf ears. The constitutional political structures have failed to rescue the girls. Nigerian women should come together and present any form of resistance or agitation – sit-out or sit-in. Just do something by putting political pressure and persuasion on the government to honor its legal and moral duties to bring home the Chibok Girls

Credit: Y!Naija

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