Here are the different types of Nigerian Mothers, and trust me, your mother will definitely fit in one or two.
(1) Mummy SWEET & SOUR
This Mother is the one who can spend the whole day chatting with you, she’s very free and always willing to accommodate your friends…she can be so sweet that you call her your “world” but not until you stay out late or ruin any of her treasured belongings, DRAMA O’ CLOCK. This mom would nag you to hell and raise two mountains out of a mole. She also can jump into conclusions quickly as her patience isn’t lengthy.
(2) BITTER LEMON MAMA
Just like the taste of Bitter-Lemon, she is bitter-sweet in every realm of affairs, she can spring up an argument in the middle of a very fun conversation, she’s quick to apologize (most times in a sarcastic way) and can easily forget what the problem was, she leaves you with anger whenever she’s at her game.
This mother rarely has the time to spend and always wants things done at her pace, she could call you home just because she’s bored and could leave you half way just because she’s bored still. This mom is difficult to understand except for her husband and grown kids.
(3) The Christian Mother
This mother comes with more than ten commandments and more rules and regulations than the Nigerian Constitution. She is a disciplinarian to the core and would stop at nothing towards moulding her kids to her religious standards. Moms like these are easily influenced by what “pastor’s wife” says and would always heed to people’s opinions first before her kids’. She rarely has time to teach but would rather instruct. She can be very temperamental but she sure cries a lot.
(4) The IYA OGE
This mother is one very hilarious persona, she’s all about her looks, her attires to “aunty bisi’s child dedication” or her shoe and bag to “August meeting”. She is the most easy to flow with because of her easy going nature. She’s calm and just about anything goes for her. She loves life to the fullest and is a very industrious woman, but mothers like these hardly spend alone-time with their kids, they only send them on errands to aunty kate’s house just to ask what color of gele is to be worn at aunty pat’s mother’s burial.
(5) The Questionnaire MOM.
This mother asks just about any question, from “who bought that shirt for you” to “why are your hands looking this way”. She rarely has the time to find out things, she would just ask you. And this mom sure would embarrass your friends with questions because she’s insensitive to the other person’s feelings. She cuts across as the “caring” mom but it just could get too much.
(6) The “I no go school” MOM.
This mother is one who feels like a bald-headed step child and would stop at nothing just to be heard and seen, and in doing so; she often embarrasses her kids with either wrong sentences or bad composure, she is always the first to be at every P.T.A meeting, making her kids go into hiding because of the fear of the unknown, she sure is very motherly but when she drops statements like “ahhh I know chioma from small na, dem born am on my behalf” you should allow her, she and her caring nature stay home.
(7) The Over-Educated MOM.
This mom would stop at letting you know she’s “been there, done that” she struggles to remain up to date and in doing so; acts a bit childish or “old mama youngie”. She loves to open the bible verse first and likes to read out every word in a newspaper. She’s adored by her mates because of her being schooled. She’s likely to be a teacher or lecturer and has high educational standards for her kids.
(8) The Nollywood MOM.
This Mom is drama unlimited!. She can cry over broken plates and shout over changing TV channels. She can be heard from miles away and if you do not know her? You could refer to her as insane. This mom has the most kids of all moms and can Pray you out of sleep! Hehehe she’s all the moms in one! But one very unique thing about her is her natural flare for her family’s well being.
These are the types of Nigerian Mothers we have, however; your MOM can possess more than one of all these categories. Well…..thank God for dynamism.
Written by:
Daniel Boyle