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Short Story: Nostalgia | By: Oluwafunminiyi Omojola

The silence deafens her.
It was not always like this, this eerie silence. Even a stranger who has never stood where she stands now knows that this sort of quiet is  man-made.

A noise in the distance punctures the stillness, rupturing the ghostly tranquillity. She glances up at the sky. It is a vulture, dark and frightening in its flight across the face of the sun. The avian calls again as it departs, leaving her in a slight shiver, chills streaking through her slender frame like flashes of lightening.

She returns her gaze to the vast expanse of land where she had played as a child. Her childhood – those were happy times. They never had much, but they had laughter. It rang somewhere in her ears now, the happy sounds of yesterday – her own laughter and Amina’s, the screeching of the other children running in the fields, the babble of chubby toddlers, the cackle of firewood, the aroma of cooking food, the shrieks of village women and the cursing of grown men.  

She had been away for only two years, serving her mistress and schooling in the west, and in that time, an ominous hand had arrived one chilly morning and rolled happiness up like a mat. The hand had tucked the mat neatly out of sight, stashed it in a place reachable only in pleasant dreams. What it left in its wake was a sobbing sadness, a cynical stench that hung onto the shoulders of the town like a desolate mother singing dirges about the death of her children. 

Hauwa’s stomach churns in a violent vortex that sucks air through her lungs and she gasps, determinedly fighting the urge to throw up. Her left hand has been a clamp over her nose and mouth since she arrived. They’d warned her about the flies and the stench, that there was no getting used to anything here any longer, the stench especially. She remembers with a sad smile a trick she and Amina used to play on each other. 
They would stick a finger into their anus, whenever it was at its smelliest, preferably immediately after shitting. Then they would stick the anointed finger in the nostril of the other person. It was a rare evil. The pong followed you everywhere you ran.  The only way to get rid of it was to remove ones nose. And that was the first instinct she had felt when the bus had dropped her off here before speeding off in a dusty haze – a violent urge to remove her own nose, to pluck it off.

 She knew that the smell was of hurriedly buried corpses. 
“There was no time for proper interment. Husbands, wives, fathers and mothers, neighbours and friends returned under the cover of darkness to bury their dead. They said they’d sleep better at night when they had ensured that the bodies of their loved ones would not be desecrated by vultures. …” she’d read in the tabloids.

She walks hurriedly on now, overtaken by an urgency to leave this place of silence. The sun is fast losing its bright yellow glow and in its place comes a mournful topaz burnish that also diminishes by the minute. She side steps the shallow graves that litter the fields, the ones she can identify from a distance. She steps on others and they are soft beneath her tired legs. 
As she walks, she wonders if she’d stepped on Mama’s grave or side stepped her fathers; she shifts uneasily when it strikes her that the one she now momentarily stands on to steady herself from a renewed wave of dissness just may be Amina’s.

By the time she reaches the dusty road, tears are falling freely from her eyes. She had arrived here with a weight on her shoulders. Now, it sits in her chest, heavy like a mill stone.

She doesn’t need anyone to tell her that she will never return.


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Oluwafunminiyi Omojola is a writer. Follow him on twitter
@ooluwafunminiyi

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Mikel, Essien missing on Mourinho's favourite players list.

It’s not like the list is long but some names are (un)surprisingly  missing. The self-acclaimed Special One has dropped some names of the players he has most enjoyed working with across his 15-year career as a manager.
‎Nigeria’s Mikel Obi and Ghana’s Micheal Essien (who used to call him Daddy) didn’t make it to the list. No sentiments! We all would have been shocked if John Terry, Didier Drogba and Frank Lampard didn’t weren’t mentioned. Mourinho’s love for those 3musketeers knows no bounds.
‎Others include Alvaro Arbeloa, Marco Materazzi, Javier Zanetti and Xabi Alonso.

Joseph Edgar's Loud Whispers: South African 419

So some stupid fraudsters sent me a very lousy email today. When I opened the letter, I laughed. Me, Ajanaku fall for this scam? Teehee.
Anyway, I decided to warn you guys incase you come across such. See the content of the letter below:
The letter reads:

 Good Day,

I am a mining services consultant. I am 46 years old male (I shall provide you with more details on my background later). I have worked for South Africa department of mineral and energy as project director and now ESCOM. At the moment, I am a consultant for several mining companies advising them on liquefied natural gas exports and storage but the government wants me to be the new spoke person of South African airways (SAA)

The South Africa economy has witnessed a steady growth since the end of Apartheid. Within the Ministry of Energy & Mineral Resources where I worked as director of Auditing and Project Implementation, Mining and Quarrying alone contributes 12.3% GDP (R25.9Billion), Gold made up R19.9Billion of the yearly export while Base metals and other mineral products contribute R6.7Billion and R5.0Billion respectively. This figure excludes Diamond, which is quoted separately.

The Government has continuously strived to improve and maintain good relationship with foreign governments and Non-Governmental financial agencies by ensuring payments for all debts owed to foreign contractors. As a matter of fact, the Government has sponsored several trade delegations overseas to improve and attract foreign investments to South Africa.

I write, asking for your indulgence in re-profiling funds to tune of Forty- Five Million Seven Hundred Thousand United States Dollars (US$45.7) which we want to keep safely overseas under your supervision. In other words, we would like you to receive the said funds on our behalf.

The Funds were derived over time from a project awarded to a foreign firm by my Department, and presently the actual contract cost have been paid to the original project executors, leaving the balance in the tune of the said amount which we have in principle obtained approval to remit overseas.

Currently, as a Director of Projects at The Department of Minerals & Energy here in Pretoria, though I’m in UK for a short holiday because my family are also here. We have the authority and approval of my partners involved in this transaction to compensate you with 25% for your participation.

This endeavor has a minimal risk factor on your part provided you treat it with the utmost discretion. You are advised to back for further clarification.

I await in anticipation your fullest co-operation.

Dr.Thabo Sibiya

Director, Project Implementation Email: [email protected] TEL: +442032907856

Yeye people. ‎

Omoni Oboli takes us through her Natural Hair journey.

My Natural Hair Journey! It’s been almost a year and five months since I did the big chop. I transitioned for a couple of months before chopping off all the perms and I haven’t looked back since then. I looooove my natural hair! Going natural is one of the best decisions I have made!
I always get questions on my hair care routine so I am going to let you all know how I care for my hair without advertising any particular hair product. Please don’t ask questions on particular products. Deal? Cool! Let’s go!
The first thing I think natural hair needs is moisture! That’s why I have my spray bottle of mostly water which I use morning and night. I spray my hair with water, not too much so it’s not dripping wet, I then proceed to rub in a handful of leave in conditioner before sealing with oil. I use different oils for my hair but my ‘go to’ oil is coconut oil. I can’t over emphasize the importance of coconut oil. I use it on my skin, I cook with it, I use it on my hair. It’s like a cure all! You can even use it on your relationship and your bank account! Lol!
So back to my hair care routine. I co-wash my hair once a week. For those who don’t know what co-washing is, it’s washing your hair with conditioner instead of shampoo. I shampoo about once a month. After washing my hair, I oil my scalp with an oil mix. My oil mix typically contains a base oil like coconut oil, almond oil, argan oil or olive oil with shea butter. I add drops of an essential oil like peppermint oil, tea tree (great for dry scalp) or lemon oil. I deep condition every week or two depends on what I feel my hair needs.
You can use any deep conditioner of your choice. You can also use a DIY deep conditioner from things in your kitchen. (That’s another lesson for another day…lol) The trick is to listen to your hair and know your hair. Your hair tells you what it needs. WTVhen it’s dry, you know you need extra infusion of moisture.
Once my hair is clean, I add a leave in conditioner, seal with oil and style. Whatever you do, pay attention to the ends of your hair. Make sure your leave in conditioner and oils get to the ends because the ends die faster and breakage starts there.
For styling, there are different styling products like curling puddings and creams. Sometimes, I skip the styling creams and just twist with the leave in conditioner in my hair. My go to style is a twist out! I like the definition it gives. Depending on the curl pattern you want, you can do big twists or small twist. Also depends on the length of your hair. When my hair was really short, I couldn’t do big twists even if I wanted to. So after twisting, I allow my hair air dry. I hardly ever use heat for my hair. I mostly twist at night and just sleep with a satin bonnet or scarf over my hair. It’s usually dry by morning. To unravel, I rub some oil on my hands, and unravel the twists gently. Also depending on what look you are going for, you can fluff out your hair. If you want a more defined style and not just a fro, you can use bobby pins or hair assesories to style.
The most important lesson to learn in the natural hair journey is to enjoy the journey! Rock your hair at various lengths! I certainly have! Don’t be in a hurry for your hair to grow. I loved my twa (teenie weenie afro) and I even miss it sometimes. I love my new length and I am not in competition with any other naturalista. We all have hair crushes and hair goals but every hair has its pace, it’s texture and its love language that it responds to. Learn to speak your hairs love language.
As always, I love to read from you. Drop a line or two. I’m still learning, I don’t claim to know it all. Let’s chat ladies, what are your secret potions and lotions? Lol! No excuses o, we must try our best to look good! Hugs and kisses

Messi to stand trial for tax evasion.

‎Some bad news for the Argentine star. ‎Lionel Messi who was accused of evading tax for 3 years (2007, 2008 and 2009) and refusing to pay €4.1m (£3m) will have to stand trial for tax evasion after his appeal was rejected by a Barcelona judge.
According to reports, his father Jorge Messi who is in charge of the World best footballer’s businesses and deals revealed that his son had no knowledge of their operations because he was too young to handle them.
The judge decreed that the Barcelona player will testify in person in court before they decide if he knew about the illegal operations. If he’s found guilty, I’m afraid he could be cooling his feet in prison for years.
 

Enyeama to Retire After 2017 AFCON

Super Eagles goalkeeper, Vincent Enyeama has revealed his plan to hang his international gloves after the next African Cup of Nations (AFCON) in Gabon in 2017. 
The 32 year-old Lille goalie is the second Super Eagles player to reach the 100 caps mark since his debut against Kenya in May 2002. He however hopes to resign from the national team by lifting the 2017 Africa Cup of Nations trophy.
He told BBC Sport, “It’s impossible to play football forever and the next tournament in Gabon will be my last one. I’ve played in two finals, lost in 2004, won in 2013, and to win in 2017 is how I hope to be remembered. But more significantly we must not get ahead of ourselves because we need to qualify first.”

Opinion: Buhari and the Nigerian Foreign Exchange | By: Olalekan Waheed Adigun

The naira is known to have dropped against major currencies in recent times. Perhaps, this was why during the 2015 Nigerian presidential election, General Muhammadu Buhari was alleged to have made the point of “making the naira equal to the dollar.” He appeared to have been speaking against the backdrop of the depreciation of the value of the naira during the elections. It is just by mere announcements or campaign rhetoric that the naira will be made equal to the dollar?
Let us concede that the fall in the naira value during the elections can be due to the scramble for the dollar by politicians for the elections on the one hand; and the panic buying of travellers traveling out of the country for fear of violent reactions that might characterise the announcement of the result, we cannot wave off Buhari’s statement as a cheap attempt to score political point.
As Nigerian Head of State (1983-1985), Buhari was known to have run his regime based on strong fiscal prudence and rigorous financial discipline, which at that period the naira was said to be stronger than the US dollar. But is this just as simple as making the naira equal to the US dollar?
Since 1999, inflation rate in the country has been on the high. The near-total dependence on oil (which is usually dictated by the international market) hasn’t helped matters. The increase in domestic price of oil has also taken its toll on the national price level. All these put the naira in a weaker position against major foreign currencies.
Presently, Nigeria lacks the capacity to refine its own crude oil which makes her depend totally on importation. There is an argument that the presently devalued naira will only encourage exportation (of crude oil). In fact, this was exactly the same Bretton Woods institutions’ arguments, and their Nigerian supporters, in defence of the Structural Adjustment Programme (SAP) in the 1980s.
Lending credence to this argument was the International Monetary Fund (IMF) Czar, Christiane Largarde, who in early 2012 justified her position on devaluation of the naira with this argument. We were spoon-fed with this argument in elementary and intermediate Economics classes, yet it still appears to make a lot of sense. When will this child grow up?
If President Buhari is serious about strengthening the position of the naira against, say the dollar, his government must make deliberate policies to diversify the economy from oil dependence; increase its productive base through youth entrepreneurship, innovation; and stimulate demand for domestically-made goods.
Credit: Premium Times Nigeria 

'Get rid of your father'. Zlatan Ibrahimovic tells Odegaard.

Paris Saint-Germain star Zlatan Ibrahimovic has told 16-year-old Norwegian player Martin Odegaard that to become independent and successful in his career, he must cut ties with his father. 

Speaking to Swedish newspaper Aftonbladet, Ibrahimovic said, ‘It’s not easy to say, but he has a father that controls everything completely.‎ First he must grow up and become a man and then get rid of his father.’

He also hailed the youngster’s performance between Norway and Sweden, at the Ullevaal Stadion.
‘He did well, played straightforward and didn’t lose many balls.‎ He has a long time to get even better. It’s good that he’s already playing for his country.’ He stated. ‎

Odegaard who made a move from Stromsgodset to Real Madrid in January became the youngest debutant in the history of the club.

NASS Leadership: APC rejects Saraki, Dogara

The All Progressives Party (APC) has rejected the emergence of Bukola Saraki and Yakubu Dogara as Senate President and Speaker of the House of Representatives, respectively. ‎The elections which took place today June 9, 2015 at the Red and Green chambers have been deemed “unacceptable”.

A statement released by the party through its National Publicity Secretary reads: 

“Senator Bukola and Hon. Dogara are not the candidates of the APC and a majority of its National Assembly members-elect for the positions of Senate President and House Speaker. The party duly met and conducted a straw poll and clear candidates emerged for the posts of Senate President, Deputy Senate President and Speaker of the House of Representatives, supported by a majority of all Senators-elect and members-elect of the House of Representatives. All National Assembly members-elect who emerged on the platform of the party are bound by that decision.

”The party is supreme and its interest is superior to that of its individual members,” the statemtent concluded.



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