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Etcetera: A Clown In The Making | By: Joseph Edgar

I have never read any of this persons articles because I see him as an unabashed seeker of relevance especially where his failure in his original calling is so apparent, so to keep in the public eye, he resorts to penning shallow and not carefully thought out nonsense which only tickles the fancy of the barely literate and ignorant like himself. 
However, I was asked by a friend to go through this his last article in which he chronicles his reason why men cheat. The arrogance of it all makes me feel like puking and the lack of careful understanding of the issues that lead to ‘men cheating’ was more than obvious in the whole waste of time he has called an article. 
This was a major rehash of beer parlor talk. I am sure in his joblessness, he has toured around in his one brown double breasted suit listening to the litany of crass jokes passed by near drunk sailors on the very sensitive relations between men and women and not possessing the deep intellectual faculties needed to decipher fact from sailors talk has scribbled this down as scientific reasons why men cheat. 
I abhor this article even if I dare state that there is no general reason that can universally explain why men cheat or even women for that matter. Each case should be looked at from the prism of the unique situation and explain it from that point. Putting a total blanket on it reeks of utter stupidity and drunken melancholy. Having access to various popular social media platforms doesn’t give anybody the right to be this stupid. 
I could not bring myself to finish the article and here is me hoping that he redeemed himself at the end, but judging from what I had read from the top, I doubt. Seizing on the Toke episode to spew such inanities is the height of wickedness. Me self I yabbed Toke when it happened, but in a lighter mode, because I could feel her pain and the pressure having to go through that kind of mess in the public eye. 
Women are very sensitive in nature. They must be loved and protected and when these things happen as they are bound to happen, a safety net should be woven around them to console, comfort and wean them out of the pain instead of casting a net of fallacy and fronting it with intellectually bereft morons like this Etcetera person. 
I have cheated in the past and it was not because I am ‘a man’ and because It’s my nature simply by my sex but because I was childish and plain stupid. I saw the pain in the eyes of the victim, I saw a strong woman withdraw into her shell with shame written all over her. I saw a woman who had given me her life and birthed children for me, go from a proud and confident woman to zombie, loosing her essence and wishing death. Many nights I cried myself to sleep on the couch, many times I hated myself for causing such wickedness to another beautiful human being and have prayed to be given an opportunity to make amends. This I feel may never happen as the pain has been etched deeply and I am still in the cold almost five years after. 
So Mr, etcetera or is it coma you call yourself, you sado-masochist diatribe has not sat down with me and millions of real men and I dare say you have not represented us in this position but yourself and yourself alone. 
I have spoken. 
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Joseph Edgar is an Investment Banker, who writes as a hobby. He has a column in Thisday on Saturdays (Page 20), and a blog josephedgarng.blospot.com where he comments on trending issues from a comical, satirical point of view. ‎

Photos: Messi fulfils his promise to Gabon President .

During his trip to Barcelona years ago the President of Gabon, Ali Bongo Ondimba met phenomenal soccer player, ‎Lionel Messi and  the latter promised to pay him a visit in his country.
The Barcelona star has made good his promise. He was in the African country yesterday (for the first time) to lay the first stone of the the Port-Gentil stadium, which will host the 2017 African Cup Venue.
The President even drove him in town for the stadium trip. The Argentine playmaker signed
autographs on team jerseys worn by his fans before laying the first stone.

“When I was in Barcelona a few years ago, I met Messi who had told me that he would come to visit me in Libreville. It was a promise which he made to me. He is a man of honour, one who has kept his word. The calendar worked out well and it has corresponded with the laying of the first stone,” the Gabonese leader stated.‎

The new stadium will have a capacity of 20,000 and is expected to host matches from November 2016.

Fan returns Davido's lost gold custom necklace

Yesterday was a memorable day for music act, David ‘Davido’ Adeleke having taken home the best male artiste of the year gong at the 2015 MAMA Awards. Caught up in the excitement of clinching the prize, Omo Baba Olowo as he’s fondly called lost his gold custom necklace which he made for thousands of dollars.
A fan of the HKN head honcho  found the chain and told him to come pick it up on Instagram. Kind of him!

My Journey to the Land of the Dead: How I Survived Six-Hour Surgery


(Written by Eze Chukwuemeka Eze, a writer and a Port-Harcourt-based media consultant. I usually feature his writeups on my blog. I had to share this too when he sent it in. Not every time political stories. LVB is wishing him quick and complete recovery.)

In daily hustle and bustle to make a living, we often tend to forget how delicate life  is and what a wonderful gift from God it is. Although I have always appreciated life and expressed gratitude to God for His blessings, I have every reason to do more of that after He mercifully delivered me from the jaws of death on 16th of July, 2015.


For about a year now I have contended with a problem with my voice. Since the problem did not appear to be life-threatening, I chose to live with it and to give my full attention to the 2015 political battles, which, I thank God, ended in victory for us the All Progressives Congress (APC) at the Federal level.  I had to finally surrender myself to the  doctors days ago when I was warned that I would totally lose my voice if I further delayed throat surgery. Thus I found myself admitted in one of the best medical centres of excellence Nigeria can boast of.



After day-long series of tests that pinpointed the exact cause of my problem, I was wheeled into the theatre for surgery. Having a premonition that the unexpected could happen, I sent text messages to close and trusted friends, church members, asking for prayers and pleaded that they should not abandon my family if I happened not to survive the surgery. One after another, they rebuked me, telling me never to doubt that the surgery would go well. They assured me that they were fervently praying for me. Further emboldened by their encouragement, I submitted myself for anaesthesia and passed out.


When I woke up many hours later, I was informed of how God and the committed medical staff comprising five doctors, five nurses and their aides rescued me from the jaws of death against all odds. According to an eyewitness, even thought the surgery that lasted for six hours was a success, it was a monumental task getting me back to life. I was informed that the doctors had to administer oxygen and employ other devices to resuscitate me after twenty minutes of concerted efforts. It would have been a disaster if not for the prayers of the Saints and expertise of the doctors. The photos showing me in the resuscitation room tell the story better.


I have been on drip since then and only allowed to drink water though I was given a little Custard this morning. I am not expected to talk until after seven days. My specimen has been sent for histology analysis that will be ready within the next two weeks time for the final treatment.


All my Muslim brothers and sisters wondering why I did not call or send text messages as usual wishing them Barka da Sallah now know what happened! Was at the borderline between life and death and couldn’t possibly have done any such. Therefore, kindly accept my belated Barka da Sallah!


I involuntarily travelled to the land of the dead and I wholeheartedly thank Almighty God for bringing me back as – to quote the Great Zik of Africa – I am not in a hurry to leave this planet since there is still a lot of work left for me to do here on earth. I thank my darling wife, Evangelist Ada Henrietta Eze who have to take care of our son and daughter hospitalised at the same time of the operation. Thanks also go to my precious children, who have proved to be a pillar of
support at this time, as always. I also thank my General Overseer church members, Rivers State
Correspondents Chapel, all my friends and well wishes for their support and prayers.



Pele Undergoes Surgery in Sao Paulo

Brazilian legend, Pele has undergone back surgery for nerve root decompression in Albert Einstein hospital, Sao Paulo. The hospital made this known in a statement on Saturday. It was said that Pele was admitted on Monday and the surgery was performed on Tuesday with his recovery satisfactory.
Furthermore, Pele’s manager, Paul Kemsley said in an email to Associated Press that Pele “underwent elective surgery to fix discomfort in his back and hip. This is the first of two corrective procedures which will be done in Brazil over the next few months to ensure Pele is strong and healthy for the Rio Olympics and all of its related travel. Perhaps he’ll even play!”

Ahmed Musa gives CSKA Moscow victory in season opener

Super Eagles forward, Ahmed Musa gave CSKA Moscow victory over rivals, Rubin Kazan in the first game of new season in the Russia Premier League.
Musa’s 87th minute strike was the only goal of the game and handed CSKA Moscow their first three points of the season.
Ahmed Musa reviewed a clever back heel from Georgi Milanove in the area and he put it past goalkeeper, Sergei Ryzhikov to give his team victory.

Super Falcons held to a 1-1 draw by Equatorial Guinea

The Super falcons were held to a 1-1 draw by Equatorial Guinea in the qualifiers for 2016 Olympics women football played in Abuja on Saturday. The lead Halimat gave the Super falcons in the 28th minute was leveled by Nigeria-born Gloria Chinasa Okoro in the second half for Equatorial Guinea.
The Falcons face a huge task as they have to claim victory in the second leg scheduled to hold in Malabo to qualify.
Interim coach of the Falcons, Musa Danjuma attributed the draw to the absence of some key players and promised to get victory in Malabo.
“Like I said I am not making excuses here but sincerely speaking if Asisat Oshoala and Onome Ebi had been here we would have won the game. But since the Olympics qualifiers is not in FIFA’s calendar overseas countries are not forced to release their players unless such clubs are willing to do so. But we will work very hard before the return leg and I am very sure with God on our side we will beat Equatorial Guinea to pick the Olympics ticket.” he said.

Davido, Yemi Alade, Dbanj, others shine at MAMA Awards 2015+ Winners list.

The 2015 MTV MAMA Awards was a night of glitz, glamour and a gathering of some of the biggest music talents in Africa. Nigerian acts scooped most of the prizes of the night. The likes of Davido, Yemi Alade, Mavin Records, Dbanj,P-Square, Patoranking won big at the event which took place in South Africa. Olamide, Basketmouth, OC Ukeje lost to their competitors.
WINNERS LIST
BEST LIVE ACT
Flavour
Mi Casa
Big Nuz
Toofan
Diamond Platnumz – Winner
BEST GROUP
Beatenberg
B4
Black Motion
P-Square – Winner
Sauti Sol
BEST POP & Alternative
Fuse ODG
Jeremy Loops – Winner
Jimmy Levis
Nneka
Prime Circle
BEST LUSOPHONE
Ary – Winner
B4
Nelson Freitas
NGA
Yuri Da Cuna
BEST FRANCOPHONE
DJ Arafat – Winner
Jovi
Laurette
Toofan
Tor 2 Garde
BEST NEW ACT
Anna Joyce
Cassper Nyovest
Duncan
Patoranking – Winner
Stonebwoy
PERSONALITY OF THE YEAR
Basket Mouth
Bonang M
OC Ukeje
Trevor Noah – Winner
Yaya Toure


2015 EVOLUTION AWARDS
2Face Idibia
Anselmo Ralph
Asa
Black Coffe
Chameleon
D’Banj – Winner
Fally Ipupa
HHP
P-Square
Samini
BEST HIP HOP
Cassper Nyovest – Winner
K.O
Olamide
Phyno
Youssoupha
BEST FEMALE
Busiswa
Bucie
Seyi Shay
Vanessa Mdee
Yemi Alade – Winner

BEST VIDEO

The Sound
Love You Everyday
Doors
Nafukwa – Winner
Crazy

BEST MALE

AKA

Davido – Winner
Diamond platnumz
Sarkodie
Wizkid
BEST COLLABORATION
AKA, Burna Boy, Da LES & JR: “All Eyes On Me” – Winner
Davido featuring Uhuru & DJ Buckz: “The Sound”
Diamond & Iyanya: “Bum Bum”
Toofan & DJ Arafat
Stanley Enow & Sarkodie: “Njama Njama Cow Remix”
SONG OF THE YEAR
Cassper Nyovest: “Doc Shebeleza”
Euphonik featuring Mpumi: “Busa”
DJ Fisherman & NaakMusiQ featuring DJ Tira, Danger & Dream Team: “Call Out”
K.O featuring Kid X: “Caracara”
Lil Kesh Featuring Olamide & Davido: “Shoki Remix”
Mavins: “Dorobucci” – Winner Sauti Sol: “Sura Yako”
Toofan: “Gweta”
Wizkid: “Show You The Money”
Yemi Alade: “Johnny
HOUNOURARY AWARD FOR ARTISTE OF THE DECADE
P-Square

Photos: Arsenal celebrate Barclays Asia Trophy (BAT 2015) win

Arsenal FC kick started the season on a winning note as they beat Everton 3-1 in the final of the Asia Trophy tournament held in Singapore few hours ago.‎ Walcott, Cazorla and Mesut Ozil all registered their names in the score sheet. The Gunners all took to the social media to celebrate their first silverware of the season.


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