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The Power of Forgiveness : How To Let Go Of Bitterness & Forgive Those Who Hurt You.

An article
by
Tony Ogunlowo

How many times have you been wronged in your life and desperately want revenge to even the score or to put your mind at rest?

Countless times without any doubt. You can’t eat or sleep because your every waking moment is consumed with getting revenge on the person who wronged you.

Even though the Good Book tells us to turn the other cheek and you might have mouthed ‘I forgive you’ to the person who wronged you there’s still that burning anger within you that will know no peace until you get your own back.

If you’ve been wronged it’s not easy to forget until the other person is punished. Psychologically it changes our perspective on life; we feel betrayed and find it difficult trusting people, we question the word ‘justice’ and why it’s failed us, we want to know why guilty people are walking around unpunished. Like a festering wound it grows in our minds, consuming our lives until the only way out is to seek revenge.

Revenge can sometimes be a bitter-sweet-pill; on the one hand we derive satisfaction from getting our own back on those who wrong us but on the other hand we risk turning into the monsters they are. We spend so much time plotting or devising our perfect revenge on them not realizing that by every minute we’re beginning to think like those who wronged us in the first place. A German philosopher once said that he who fights monsters must take care that he doesn’t become one himself. Not forgetting what Confucius said, “..before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves..”, your revenge trip might just backfire on you!

Two wrongs do not make a right. If you fight with a mad man on the street what are people going to say? They will say two mad men are fighting! Likewise if someone does something bad to you and you retaliate you become as bad as the person who wronged you in the first place.

So let’s say you’re still bent on revenge. You decide to strike back. Good! You’ve got your revenge, happy now? Does it compensate you for the pain and suffering you’ve been through or do you just pretend to yourself that it does? It doesn’t! The pain of what that person did to you, either physically or mentally, will always be there and no amount of revenge will get rid of it.

As for those who are suffering from spiritual attacks, which is the preferred weapon of choice of our people, I urge you not to reply in kind, resist the temptation. Any misuse of spiritual powers to cast spells or do juju is evil and demonic. It’s best to leave such diabolical practices well alone. The divine retribution for using such evil powers or entities, irregardless of the circumstances, is often severe. In saying this I’m not saying don’t protect yourself. Heaven helps those who help themselves. Fortify yourself with meditation, prayer and the Light and you’ll be fine.

Sometimes, without sounding like a coward, its best to just walk away and leave the other person to face divine justice which has a way of punishing us for our misdeeds when we least expect it. As the Yorubas will say – “ God didn’t put their punishment cane in your hand”. Leave them, they’ll be dealt with. With time your wronged heart will heal and you’ll be able to move on with your life as the better person who didn’t seek revenge risking becoming like them.

To summarise, the secret to the power of forgiveness is very simple – learn to forgive those who wronged you, in your heart, and move on! It doesn’t mean you’re weak, stupid or a coward. When you forgive somebody, unconditionally, you’re relieving yourself of a great burden.

“….when you look deeply you begin to understand,

the moment when you understand, compassion is

born in your heart, and then it is possible for you to

forgive…” – Thich Nhat Hanh.

Very few people in the world today have the ability to forgive someone unconditionally – Make yourself one of them. You will be elevated to a state of grace that is neither pretence or forced. If someone can forgive those who strung him up on a cross why can’t you? 

Lionel Messi scores against Petr Cech and sends Twitter into a meltdown

Lionel Messi scored his first ever goal against Petr Cech and sent Twitter into a meltdown. He ended a run of 10 hours and 11 mins without scoring against him.

Just about two months ago, the former Chelsea skipper had bragged about being able to deny Messi the chances of scoring against him during his spell at Chelsea. Well, the Argentine smashed that record tonight.

The Gunners contained the visitors at the first half of the game but ran out of steam at the 71st minute, when Messi brilliantly chipped in a pass from Neymar.  Messi ruined their night further and netted the second goal  at the 84th minute via a penalty, no thanks to a slide at the area by Flamini who replaced Francis Coquelin at the 82nd minute.

Barcelona are now 33 games UNBEATEN in all competitions since a 2-1 loss to Sevilla on 3 October. The Catalans will host the Gunners in the second leg of the game in Camp Nou in the coming weeks. 

Luis Suarez left passport at home ahead of Arsenal vs Barcelona clash in London

To Barcelona fans reading this, I hope you’ll take a deep breath and relax. It isn’t what you are thinking.lol.
Uruguayan player, Luis Suarez reportedly  arrived at Barcelona Airport yesterday and realized he had left his passport at home. But for someone’s kind gesture, the Barcelona striker would have missed today’s Champions League game featuring the Catalans and the gunners. The person cao me back with the passport on time and he was able to make the trip to London.

Stephanie Linus' DRY Wins Big At The Pan African Film Festival, USA

Stephanie Linus’ movie ‘DRY’ has again recorded another feat. The movie has won the Programmers’ Award for Narrative Feature at the recently concluded Pan African Film Festival in Los Angeles, USA.
This award was given alongside other prestigious awards to film makers from across the world whose movies were screened at the largest and most prestigious black film festival in America.
It would be recalled that DRY has also won a host of local and international awards including the ‘Best Protagonist’ Award at the Bentonville Film Festival in Arkansas, USA.
DRY is nominated in 9 categories at the Africa Magic Viewers Choice Awards 2016 (AMVCA) which comes up this March, and has also won at the BON Awards and Zafaa Global awards in categories such as: Movie with the best social message, Best Cinematography, Best Screenplay, Best Child Actress and Best Producer.
Produced, directed, and starring Nollywood’s A-List actress, Stephanie Linus, the film is an inspired true story that depicts the life of two young girls living as child brides in West Africa. The critically acclaimed movie focuses on child marriage and Vesico Vaginal Fistula (VVF), journeying into the heart-wrenching details of a culture not too many films dare to explore.
DRY is currently available on online platforms such as iTunes, Amazon, Google Play, Sony PlayStation and VUDU for viewers throughout the U.S.

Femi Adebayo gets political appointment.

Lawyer-turned actor, Femi Adebayo has been appointed as a Special Assistant to the Kwara State Governor. He joins the likes of Ini Edo and Kate Henshaw who also were appointed by Akwa Ibom and Cross River States Governors weeks back. The talented thespian made the announcement on his Instagram page few minutes ago.



 “Today i was appointed as Special Assistant( SA) to the Kwara State Governor,on Arts,Culture and Tourism ???.Thank God 4 an opportunity 2 transform my state into a foremost tourist state that will attract foriegn and domestic tourist .My fans i need ur support. Leave me not.?? “
He wrote. 

Barcelona FC to set up its first African football academy in Lagos

Ambode-Barca
Spanish giants, Barcelona FC are looking to establishing its first African football academy in Lagos State. Representatives of the club paid a visit to Lagos State Governor, Mr Akinwunmi Ambode where they discussed the possibility of the partnership. 
Pledging his support, Ambode said, “this visit by FC Barcelona is coming at a point where I believe strongly that we have nothing else to say than to say we are committed into this partnership because we know the partnership will give us the first FCBEscola in Africa. I was made to understand that this is the first of its kind in Africa and so Lagos is priding itself as a major receptor of the next academy to be established in Africa.
“I know that this will create a very good platform for youth development, grassroots empowerment and also for the value of sportsmanship. We share the same values with FC Barcelona which are respect, courage, humility, social integration and community service.”

Eagles assistant coach begs NFF for a month’s salary

Super Eagles assistant coach, Jean Francois Lusciuto has reportedly pleaded with the Nigeria Football Federation to be paid at least a part (a month’s salary) of what it owes him in salaries for his treatment in Belgium. The Belgian, who had a surgery for a stomach disorder in South Africa last month was left stranded in Lagos when the Eagles returned from the 2016 CHAN in Rwanda and had to return to his family in Togo is being owed five months’ pay, which is about  N10m at N2m /month.

A source hinted Africanfootball.com.“The ‘whiteman’ is really down — his stomach problem, which needed surgery in South Africa, has persisted and he now wants to fly to Belgium for better treatment. He has said he only needs his salary for a month to do that and he has written several mails to the NFF, but sadly he has not received any reply.”

Tim Cahill signs for Chinese club

Have the gods suddenly moved to China? Socceroos striker, Tim Cahill has signed for Chinese club Hangzhou Greentown on a 5-month deal. The 36-year-old who renewed his contract with Shenghai last November scored 11 times in 28 matches. 

Asisat Oshoala organises U-17 tournament to get girls off the streets.

Nigeria/Arsenal ladies forward, Asisat Oshoala has organized a women’s football U-17 tournament. Aimed at getting young girls off the streets, the maiden edition of the sporting event is set to kick off on Tuesday, February 23rd, 2016 at the Bishop Aggrey field Mushin, Lagos and end on Saturday 27th February, 2016. 
 “It’s all about giving back to the society and the community, where I started from. We need to develop the game of football from the grassroots, that’s why I am organising the Asisat Oshoala football tournament for young ladies. We need to get the kids off the streets and prostitution. We will have time to talk and encourage ourselves.” The 23 year old stated.

The match will fearure 24 teams. Participating clubs include FC Robo Ladies, Phoenix Queens, Royaltoms, COD Ladies, Kadesh Ladies, Tokas Queen. Winners will receive cash prizes and trophies 

Henry Thierry explains how Arsenal can beat Barcelona

Arsenal Legend, Henry Thierry in his column for The Sun provided the Gunners useful tips on how to beat their visitors, Barcelona when they meet for their Champions League last 16 in London on Tuesday night. The Frenchman who also played for the Catalans believes Arsenal can repeat the feat of 2011 where they won the home leg 2-1. He wrote: 
“They have to accept they will probably only have 30 per cent possession and must be so efficient when they do get the ball. The whole team must defend more as a unit and the wingers must tuck in and play more in their own half. You very rarely get the chance to play against Barcelona so you must be prepared to sacrifice parts of your attacking game, home and away. 

“Arsenal must be brave on the ball. They need to stay compact, play on the counter and score every time they get in their penalty area. They can’t be exposed in the middle and must force Barcelona to run back 60 yards before they get the ball. If you allow them to stay in your half for wave after wave, it becomes almost impossible to defend.”
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